This is the end...

I'm going to quit dA by the end of 2007, January of 208 at the latest. My hiatus and talking with some people has helped me confirmed something, and I am both thankful and a bit sad for this realization...

I am not an artist.

I lose myself in anguish,
For tonight.
Help me get over you...

It's true, and I've secretly known it all along, I believe. I mean, how can someone who isn't original themselves create something and even HOPE for it to be any different? That's right, I am a fake. I try to lie to myself by "being different", but I am as truthful to myself as a tabloid. I cannot create anything without having to mooch off of the work of true artists whose amazing art is already preyed upon enough. I am personally disgusted with myself for contributing to those I help insult...The Mary-Sues.

It's undeniable, nothing I make has depth. It's not me. What is? I don't even know. But it's obvious after 15 years of pointless toil that art is NOT me. I cannot even CONCEIVE anything that is new or different, and now I understand why no one will roleplay with me for long.

I wouldn't roleplay with myself, either.

One last false apology,
Help me get over you...

Anyway, dA is only making my dumb fantasy worse. I put up things and become encouraged by people who praise me because they are too kind to flame truly bad art when they see it. Why? I have no clue...But it has worsened things far too much, I fear. I think I need to pursue another career that fits someone like myself, one that requires little TRUE originality. There are plenty of places to mooch and be appreciated.

I'm sorry for always whining to everyone here, I love all of you greatly. ^_^ I will most likely say good bye for a few months while I clean things out. Then I will let this account die like it should.

Oh, and if anyone wants to take a character for their own use, feel free. I know they'll turn out amazing. Please send me a link if you make anything...Just ask for my e-mail, kay?

...I wonder if our Criminal Studies class still has openings?

In my mind,
Blood drips from your eyes.
A beautiful,
Last goodbye...